Today, mom, my sisters, and my sister's husband went to the Giant Center to see Stars on Ice, which my mom bought tickets for a few months ago, for around $70. We were supposed to have relatively close seats, but on the side instead of the middle, thus the relatively cheap pricing, but in the end, our seats were actually moved, due to the "tech" being in the way; I guess the organizers didn't know the 113 B seats were going to have tech screens in the way when they were selling tickets.

Due to this, we had to go back up top and talk to one of the staff, who handed us ticket stubs (which was nice, since the tickets in general are now digital through an app, but now we have a little souvenir), and said we'd be on the ice/in the penalty box. Sadly, we did have to get split up, though: my middle sister and her husband were on the ice, near the corner (kind of close to where our original B seats would've been, except on the ice), and the rest of us three were in the Penalty Box instead, near the middle of the rink.

It wasn't a perfect spot by any means, as we had to crane our headss back and forth because we were so close, and we did have the "ice" seat people (who paid ~$200) in front of us, but it was super neat to be so close to the skaters, being able to easily see their faces. It was also nice that we had plenty of leg room, and could move our seats around. I would've moved my seat right next to the barrier, but I didn't want to get in the way of the other three strangers who were in the box with us, so I just moved my seat up maybe half a foot for a slightly closer view.

There was also a tiny fridge in the corner, which we opened out of curiosity, and it contained hockey pucks! Huh!

More indepth recounting:

Anyway, we left home shortly after I got home, around 4:30; Sister's Husband drove, in their recently-bought car, and we ate at El Rodeo, then got to the Giant Center by 6:20. We got to our penalty box seats at 6:45, and it started right around 7:10. It started with an opening with everyone, then moved to individuals, then back to everyone with some "it's hot in here" song. The highlight for me was Danny O'Shea (and Ellie Kam), because he's just such a happy, fun guy, from what I see (also, because he's old; relatable). Regrettably, he did fail a difficult maneuver to skate under Ellie, which caused a fall; I hope she's okay; on the bright side, I saw no cut, at least? But anyway, I love them, for being the underdog "weakest links" in the Olympics that were expected to place Last (out of five) in the Team Event, but they skated their best skate of the year and got their best score of the year, right when it mattered, clinching 4th instead, which ended up winning us the Gold. Such a wonderful and deserved win—even if it was technically 4th out of 5, but darn it, it's touching, especially since they weren't "supposed" to be at the Olympics and were just a replacement, and it was Danny's first time ever, at 34 years old (one of the oldest "Olympic debuts").

I love Danny, for so many reasons.

But of course, seeing Ilia and his many backflips was also neat. He did three in a row here, and while it's not high quality, I did catch it on camera.

In general, I struggled with what I should do: record for the sake of my poor memory, or just live in the moment. I think living in the moment is important and we're too obsessed with chronicling things on phones (often for social media engagement), but I also am rather sentimental by nature, and do want "evidence" to look back on years later. Without video, in five years, I'd remember practically nothing of the actual "feeling" of being there; if I have video, I can look back and relive those moments...in low quality, but in some form, nevertheless. Anyway, I did record a lot, but I tended to record with my phone to the side, while I was watching live, which was good, because my phone made everything look so small and washed out; if I watched the entire program on my phone, it'd be really sad.

But I also didn't record absolutely everything, because I wanted to clap for all the wonderful things they did (and felt guilty when I was recording and couldn't do that as well). I wonder how the skaters feel about people recording. Do they think it's eye-rollingly pathetic, or do they think it's endearing that people are so starstruck by them to have to record lower quality video of a no-stakes show, when there's already better recorded, riskier skates that already exist during actual competitions?

Anyway, we occasionally had the skaters get really close to us, which was neat. Ilia placed a rose around our section at one point, and in general, whenever people skated near the edge of the ice, we got a good view.

There was an intermission halfway through, at 8:10, which was supposed to be 20 minutes, but was more like 30. It started up again around 8:40, then ended right around 9:30, with the skaters skating around the rink, slapping hands with the people who had the "on the ice" seats. We were so close, yet so far away! My sister and her husband got to touch their hands; lucky! (That said, I'd be stressed that I'd somehow mess up, so in a way, it's also a blessing.)

Leaving took a bit, but it wasn't as dreadful as it could've been. We got home right around 10:30. The others left shortly after, then mom watched the baseball game, which was thankfully, a very good game. The Reds gave the Pirates 7 consecutive walks, tying the all-time high, which has only happened two other times (my mom said the Pirates themselves were one of the others who did that). First time in 43 years, I think. The Pirates won 17-7, so it was a very high scoring game; 7 runs is nothing to sneeze at either.

My dad was at some Book Club guy's party, and he surprisingly didn't arrive home by 1 AM.

And now it's 2:30, and I should sleep. It was a nice Saturday. Everyone liked the Stars on Ice, and were even mentioning that we should do it again next year. That'd be nice...

May 7, 2026: New Laptop

I don't like buying a new laptop before the last is at least 4 years old, but with my E key (and Q and Windows) dead, it's been difficult to draw (now using 3 as "E"), so I decided I'd get a new laptop before Art Fight. Given the timeline I had, May was considered the best month to buy one, so I did.

As usual, it was a pain to move stuff over/re-login to things, but at least it's (mostly) done. I miss my 17.2" screen; everything so tiny now, including writing this entry—albeit, part of it is because I'm using the "Recommended" 125% setting, when I had it on 100% on my old laptop. So many things that I made be one line on my old computer are now on two lines here at 125%, which bugs me, and also makes me worry that maybe on most computers, my stuff hasn't been as "pretty" as I thought it was. My graphs here require scrolling right now, and less characters fit on the first line on my front page. Boo.

Anyway, I've had no technical problems yet, which is good, outside of the track pad being less responsive, and often it will refuse to scroll at all. Very weird and annoying. What is nice is that this computer can actually update, and therefore, I have access to seconds on my clock! I have longed for this for almost four years. Finally! I still think it's so stupid to not have seconds on a CLOCK. CLOCKS ARE MEANT TO TELL TIME, MAN. Maybe some people think seconds don't matter, but oftentimes, I'm waiting for precise moments, and I had no access to that on my computer before; I'd have to use a site. Windows 11 still starts with no seconds by default, but having the option to add it is a godsend. Thank you.

May 10, 2026: Baseball

For Mother's Day, we traveled to Baltimore to watch an Orioles game (and before that, I had a short Geist game, but I didn't draw anything).

It was a pretty close game, but thankfully, the Orioles won, with some close calls. We got a "Crab Hat" pre-game, and all wore them; it's a fine hat, but I'm not much of a hat wearer. Maybe it'll get use someday; who knows. Maybe I should bring it on vacation.

The Pirate Parrot is still so much better than the Orioles guy; why does that happy face have to turn angry sometimes, man? The Pirate Parrot would never be angry; he's wholesome.

"You know... until the very end... I loathed, despised, hated... And deeply loved you.”

That quote is my opinion of this game as a whole. It's one of those perplexing games where I'd say 80% of the content is a slog, and sometimes actively painful to get through, but I am a huge fan of the other 20%, and that small portion makes me love it. I don't regret playing at all—especially, since I discussed the bulk of the game with a friend, posting my stupid Crackpot Theories constantly. Being able to theorize throughout a game is so fun; perhaps I enjoy Mystery Boxes, despite being critical of them, too...

Would I recommend the game to others? Not really—and even if they did play, I'd probably give them a guide on how to get the "best" routes, and offer they skip the rest.

A bunch of rambling about it

"Fun" Facts:

• My first "choices" Route ended up being Romance, and as someone who prefers plot, this was agony. I ended it with Kiyoshika and moved on.
• My next Route was Retsnom, which was far better, despite it being a Darumi-focused one. One of the best, probably.
• Cult of Takumi and Comedy were next, neither of which I liked. I got super unlucky with the Routes I stumbled upon. I get that a lot of people like Cult of Takumi for it being a "dark" fanservice story, but everyone was Out of Character due to drugs, meaning none of it mattered, outside of Takumi's and Nozomi's reactions, and I didn't care enough about them to be invested. The dark endings are the only things I liked about the Route, but those don't make up for all the goofy weird stuff I had to slog through to get there.

Tier List: Midway Route 0

Everyone was actively annoying to bland. I couldn't even remember the characters' names, so I had nicknames. Kiyoshika was "Sword Girl," Gaku was "Poor Guy," and Eito was "Glasses Friend." Oh, how wrong that nickname was... Also, due to loving Eito's "Jury" attack, I fed him most of my Commanders and buffed almost solely Jury through Route 0, so the rest of my team was very under"leveled" for the following routes. Whoops.

Tier List: Finished Game

Overall, I'm still not a fan of a lot of the cast, but I adore Eito, and found Kiyoshika super amusing. Hiruko loses points from the S.F., but overall, I'm a fan. Darumi is such a pain, but Retsnom Route was great. Yugamu is a fan favorite, but I can't stand edgy perverts, and his antics in the Serial Killer Route made me dislike him even more. I tried so hard to like Gaku, but he was an annoying unfunny pervert way too often, after Route 0. Shame.

It is interesting how it's truly a Kodaka + Uchikoshi game (albeit, more Kodaka): Danganronpa meets Zero Escape. I'd say overall, those two series are better than this one, and yet, I'd consider myself more invested with THL, due to one guy: Eito Aotsuki. I have a few gripes with his writing, but when I toss those aside, he's such a fascinating character.

On Eito... [SPOILERS FROM HERE ON OUT]

While I find how his "condition" works hard to believe (he sees/smells/feels/hears people as if they were horrifying monsters, including if they're wearing a mask...?), if I suspend my disbelief, he becomes such a fun character to think about. He might have originally disliked humans due to his odd cognitive disorder, but through books, he learned how ugly humans were in their actions as well, making them truly repulsive, inside and out.

He hates humanity and wants to destroy it, but at the end of the day, he's human too. He still does desire companionship, deep down. It makes for a fun push and pull, where he's an utterly terrible person most of the time, desiring the suffering of those he was supposed to work with, but as much as he seemingly hates them and wants them to die, he also doesn't want their time together to end.

I like to think that he's been so hate-filled for so long that it's how he shows affection as well. He focuses his disdain on the main character, Takumi, more than anyone else, to the point it becomes almost homosexual in how he words a lot of his vitriol.

"So long as my consciousness remains, my face will be the last thing you'll ever see."

"This isn't the end I would have chosen for us, but at least I got to hear just how much you hate me."

"I'm so glad that I get to share this hatred I've been carrying all my life with you, Takumi."

"Give in to hate, the strongest emotion of them all! The one thing that unites you and me!"

I really like the idea of someone who only knows hate sub-consciously trying to bond through hate. It's tragic. I love this guy (but only when broken; he's kind of just cringey in canons where he's "normal." Fixing him later is fine, but he's only interesting if he started his life with suffering and hatred.)

My disdain for Standard-Fundamental Route

I ended the game with Standard-Fundamental, as many do: the "Good Ending." I'm super underwhelmed.

• As is standard Uchikoshi, some plot points are brought up, then never explained. The random Meteor? The lady in the lab coat? The Memory chip she gave Hiruko? The Vertical Loop machine she mentioned? Probably some other things? Brought up, then never explained nor used. Sure, maybe it'll be covered in DLC, but make the base game complete, instead of tossing in unexplained stuff, please.
• A lot of things were resolved way too easily, in a contrived manner, making them not feel earned.
• While Eva had some amusing lines (and plenty of cringe ones, evening it out), this "Good End" has her brainwashed. ...Great? Eito is potentially brainwashed too, given Hiruko "fixed" him with the same method. Brainwashed or not, I don't like "fixed" Eito. He's accepted into the group way too easily and becomes part of the boring "FIGHT ON!" hivemind, doing almost nothing of note outside of helping Tsubasa build a little anti-machines gun they use once on two different route splits, for two different things. It's so sad.
• Hiruko's reason for not fixing Serial Killer Takumi is evil, and she should be punished for it.
• The random "twist" that Earth Satellite had another Clone Shion to replace the old one was such a boring way to add extra tension.

Larger rant on S.F.: Once Eito was cured (Day 46?), I was getting really pessimistic with how this game was going, everything lining up way too easily. It was so contrived, fixing stuff that was a problem in other Routes, so they could focus on their Time Leaping. But then... Day 50 arrived, and I was given hope that something was afoot, when Sirei explained that Hiruko didn't have a second USB that she used to cure Serial Killer (G'ie) Takumi—aka, Takumi-G'ie was still running free. Why would that be?

I became even more hopeful when Takumi confronted her about this lie, and she still insisted we shouldn't focus on fixing Serial Killer Takumi, and instead Leap elsewhere. I went against her, and after jumping back, I learn there was a hole in Takumi's Leapsuit. Did Hiruko sabotage him? More evidence she's a G'ie. A little later, Takumi learns he still didn't fix his Serial Killer self, because he jumped to the wrong timeline; Hiruko says it was his fault, since he chose the location, but is that really all? Takumi messed up, thus this problem still isn't resolved, after two separate attempts? Seems fishy. Hiruko being a G'ie would also explain why Kako-G'ie—their enemy—simply handed over the Livor Mortis codes: they were secretly working together, stringing Takumi along! From there, I could explain so many other things I had a problem with:

• Hiruko found out how to make the Brain Repair machine work better in some unknown timeline offscreen? That's not a contrivance: that's her being a G'ie, actually hurting us!
• The rest of the cast are weird shells of their former selves? She brainwashed them too! (She even mentions at one point: "You guys aren't yourselves right now. Something is very wrong. Go back to your rooms and cool off. Understood?")
• Adding to this, it's on this "aren't yourselves" day when Eito and Tsubasa show off the "toy" gun they made, which Hiruko ends up using against Kako-G'ie in another route split. Given the timing, this means he helped make an anti-G'ie weapon around a time when Hiruko was saying they weren't acting like a brainwashed hivemind... Hmmmmmm...
• Takumi accidentally hitting Hiruko's glasses off, and her later arriving for their next Leap a little late, blaming Takumi, because her glasses clock broke? Obviously, just an excuse, since she'd know it was broken ahead of time and would've done something about it. Surely, she was actually doing something nefarious...

I was less sure of this, especially since it wouldn't explain Takumi being the odd one out, but I thought maybe the rest of the cast were all G'ie in this timeline. I started thinking this due to the aforementioned gun Eito got Tsubasa to make on their "aren't yourselves" day; Eito himself later used it against Sirei and claimed that it's designed to work against machines, but Hiruko used it on a G'ie in a different timeline. This made me think that G'ie themselves were machines, and thus, when that brainwashing faded a bit and the cast started to not act like "[themselves]", that's when Eito commissioned that gun, as a tool against their own G'ie programming. He claims it's a harmless toy so Hiruko-G'ie doesn't catch on, and shoots it at himself to prove it.

Wow! Things weren't contrived in our favor! They were secretly contrived intentionally, by the G'ie pulling the strings! Hiruko-G'ie was in a timeloop, which required everyone to stay alive to escape, thus, she kept them alive and brainwashed, for her own purposes!

...None of that ended up being true.

• Kako-G'ie handed over the Livor Mortis codes to its enemy because why not.
• Hiruko learned how to make the Brainwash Machine stronger offscreen because why not.
• Eito was so easily fixed because why not.
• The rest of the cast was weirdly generic and helpful (and "FIGHT ON!") because why not.
• Hiruko scolded them that one day and said they weren't themselves because... I have no idea, but why not, I guess.
• Takumi's tear in his suit when he went to the Serial Killer Timeline (but NOT the Coming-of-Age timeline Hiruko wanted to go to, if we choose that option) happened because sheer bad luck; it already had a hole.
• Takumi knocking Hiruko's glasses off (hours before their meetup) is the real reason why she was late, just so they'd not have enough time to jump back to their own loop...? Aka, mega contrivance, that you could've explained some other way.

Maybe these things and more were bait for me to suspect Hiruko, and I sure took it, but being wrong just leaves me empty. Being wrong in of itself is fine. I was wrong about tons of theories. The problem with being wrong here is that all these gripes and contrivances I had end up being truly just gripes and contrivances, not carefully laid malicious plans that seem to work in our favor too easily, because the enemy wants the same thing as us: to get the Livor Mortis Codes, and to keep everyone alive to escape the Time Loop.

It's so underwhelming. I was begging for some twist until the last moments of the game, and it never came. Everything is so unearned; it's sad. Worst End. Scenario 02 or Rebellion is my canon ending. S.F. can go die in a ditch.

Wrap Up

Anyway, here are some dumb memes I made during my first few Routes, all starring the best character in the game (normie opinion):

The Hundred Line, you are so horribly flawed, but I had tons of fun. If there is DLC, I'll be very interested (but please, skip more days and add less filler "we tried and failed" days).

May 22–23: House to Self

My parents went to Pittsburgh to visit my aunt while she was there, so I got the house to myself on Friday and Saturday. I wasn't all that productive, sitting downstairs watching YouTube most of the time. After hearing about it a month or two ago, I decided this was a good time to finally try out Yomi no Tsugai anime people were saying was good—the manga being by Hiroumu Arakawa (Fullmetal Alchemist creator). The first episode was pretty good, but from there, I can't say I was particularly impressed. No character really grips me, and I actively dislike Asa, the sister of the Main Character. Still, given it's by Awakawa, I will be giving this show a much bigger chance than I give most of them—and it's also just kind of nostalgic to watch an anime week to week again. I've technically been sort of doing that with Liar Game too, as mentioned previously. That one has continued to be fine too, but still nothing special.

I've heard others uplift Witch Hat Atelier (or something), but do I care enough to try that? Not right now, at least. I haven't been invested in new anime for a while; Maybe I've simply outgrown it. I disliked Frieren, I've disliked Vinland Saga even more, Dungeon Meshi seems overrated... I feel like Attack on Titan was the last anime I was truly excited for; that had its own flaws, but it was pretty gripping, despite that.

Save me, new Madoka Magica movie, whenever you come out.

But I digress. I also watched some Outer Wilds content, since I was in the mood for that. I watched someone do a "troll" playthrough, which was amusing, then started watching what people argue is the "best" Let's Play, by an astrophysist. It has been pretty good so far. This is what Outer Wilds fans must do once they complete the game: relive the game vicariously through other people playing it for the first time.

May 24: Memorial Day Sunday

As usual, we went out to Lancaster to visit my aunt and uncle, mostly talking to my uncle outside. It was surprisingly cool for mid-May, so I'm glad I brought my (admittedly pretty light) winter coat. We learned the campground gave out free ice cream every Memorial Day, and it was really good ice cream, with generous servings (they even allowed for seconds, which we didn't take). I got Raspberry and Chocolate; the other two flavors were Vanilla and Rootbeer. They also had some basic toppings; I got some sprinkles on my chocolate. Before then, we had pizza from the same place as last time.

May 25: Memorial Day

I went with my family to see the Memorial Day parade: the second time I've watched it. The Warehouse was in it this year, no surprise, tossing full bags of stuff out to the parade attendees. Chris recognized us, and told his people to throw lots of food at us. Regrettably, we weren't a fan of the Pig Skins, though the single Spicy Funyun we got is good for me. We also got a bunch of Oreo sleeves.

Afterwards, like last time, we ate at the Democrat house, and this time, a guy had vegetarian burgers available. While mine was pretty burned, the flavor on the inside was quite good. I also liked the apple cake someone made, which my mom and sister thought was just "okay" (too dry, I think). I, on the other hand, went back for two more pieces.

May 28: Library Trivia: 80s

Megan hosted it this time, and I saw she had the Apollo Justice trilogy on her Desktop; good taste (she also had Stardew Valley). It was the biggest crowd I've seen, including at least two new teams, making for 7 total.

"Richard the Human" (named that because they knew a dog Richard too) joined us, and he helped us get 2-3 answers. We were in third place before Final Jeaopardy, and risked all but 8 of our 43 points. We figured we were going to lose, since another team had done super well (I think they had 46, maybe more). The final question was difficult: What was the most popular girl's name in the 80s. We weren't sure at all, but my sister mentioned knowing a lot of "Jessica"s at work, so we decided on that.

When the firs team also guessed that, we had some hope, but when three teams guessed "Jennifer"—including the current leaders—we figured we were wrong. But no, Jessica was right, leading to us winning! Hurray!

May 31: Frozen Raspberries

Frozen raspberries were on sale at Giant today: they were $3, but with $2.50 off with Gas Points (per 10 ounces?) I don't think this has ever happened before. It's a 207-Days-Before-Christmas Miracle. Is this important? Yes and no. It's nice to appreciate the little things in life, and this is genuinely such a special treat. We basically never have raspberries, frozen or otherwise.

Generalized

I've still been so unmotivated in general, be it drawing, working on my game, or even this site. My drawing motivation was already low, but adding in the new laptop and Windows Ink woes has surely exacerbated that lack of investment. I can't get Photoshop pen sensitivity to work without Windows Ink—and this is after doing the usual PSUserConfig edit, of course. I tried some extra step, but that still didn't work, and that's after restarting my entire computer at least four times. It's so frustrating. Thankfully, Windows Ink seems less buggy in Photoshop than it was in the past, but it's still annoying, since I can't easily move or resize Photoshop itself with my tablet, without it being really annoying, and clicking around anywhere else is a pain.

I hate Windows Ink. Why must it exist.

Art Fight is basically a month away now, and I fear it'll be my worst year yet. I kind of dread it and worry the excitement and sense of community isn't going to fix that motivation. Will I even feel a sense of community this year? Who knows. My friends have been pretty silent this past half-year, so maybe it'll be a pretty lonely year. At least Void is maybe finally recovering from her many many issues.

I am excited to use my dumb Art Fight stats again, at the very least. That's about it. I'm contemplating making an Art Fight "Cytu.be" and hosting various Movie Nights, but I feel like it's not going to work out, if not due to lack of others' participations, because I am not big on commitments myself. Will even I have the motivation to watch a bunch of videos on Cytu.be every few nights? I don't know.

Also, as usual, I'm dreading Community Band. It tends to be fine after the initial fears, but every year, without fail, I am filled with dread for that first rehearsal. It's my Social Anxiety. It's a shame it always starts a week or two before Art Fight—and this year, the second rehearsal is on the first day of Art Fight, noo!